Say It Ain’t So Aunt Becky!

Have mercy!

In a stunning discovery made today by the US Department of Justice, Aunt Becky is in some big trouble, mister.

“Hollywood actresses Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin and a slew of chief executives are among 50 wealthy people charged in the largest college cheating scam ever prosecuted by the U.S. Department of Justice, federal officials said Tuesday.

Those indicted in the investigation, dubbed “Varsity Blues,” allegedly paid bribes of up to $6 million to get their children into elite colleges, including Yale, Stanford, Georgetown and the University of Southern California, federal prosecutors said.

“This case is about the widening corruption of elite college admissions through the steady application of wealth combined with fraud,” Andrew Lelling, the U.S. attorney for the District of Massachusetts, said at a news conference.”

ABC News

Is this the face of a convict? I think not. In fact, I would argue Lori was just doing what any loving parent would do. If there were any crime committed here, it would be the crime of loving her kids too much. The Chef has got your back, Beck.

Now as for that other desperate housewives hussy, pshh. Guilty! Ring her up. We all saw what her husband, William H. Macy was like in Fargo. No self respecting woman would…marry a man…who acted as a character…that played a slime ball role…so well.

Not Fooling The Chef. Nope.

All kidding aside, this is America! If people want to use their power and wealth to get their dumb kids into great schools, so be it. They will most likely fail out or pay for A’s, which in that case, will be exposed when they get into the workforce. And if they don’t make it to the workforce, they aren’t hurting anyone anyway. This country was founded on bribes and backdoor deals. Take your constitution out of the back pocket of your self-Righteous pants and slap yourself with it. ‘MERICA!

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